Curiosity killed this cat

I've always been a curiosity natured person, since kid I was a kid. I started my sexually promiscous lifestyle at age 25 while living in Mexico. I gradually became more and more involved in my own reckless sexual drive that I couldn't go to bed without having sex with one or more strangers, playing safe always. All of this, using only poppers at times, then some others not. When I went to live in Dallas, Tx, at age 39, I started imitating and being curious about the sex lifestyle there and started going to the bathhouses at first, drunk, until someone offered me something to sniff up, a white powder they called Tina, and appealing to my curiousity, of course I tried it. Felt so great, so empowered, strongly sexual than ever and most of all, very uninhibited. I kept on going, smoking it, sniffing it (never injected), and one time I tried the rectum way, which is done with the Tina diluted in hot water and flushed into the rectum using a needleless insulin syringe. This brings the high almost immediately, and for some reason, makes it last longer. Then someone offered me the liquid E or G, again the curious cat couldn't keep from trying it. It took only a week for this cat to be fucked bareback by almost the entire bathhouse customers. I threw in the trash, 20 something years of safe sex, for one week of wild sex and drugs. Now I'm HIV+, and been punishing myself by not having sex at all, even safe, since Dec 21st 2005, and plan to keep it this way. CURIOSITY KILLED THIS CAT, 'cause now I feel like a walking zombie, walking dead. Nothing will be the same anymore, EVER. I'm somewhat glad it ended, wish I could have ended it myself without the harm, but the important thing is that, one way or another, it's finished. Took my soul, but it's gone.