My First Cigarette

When I was younger, I was adamant not to smoke cigarettes. I understood how harmful they were from personal experience; my grandfather passed away when I was 8 years old from lung cancer. He was a man that took the position of my own father (because my mother and father were divorced, and I did not have a very good relationship with my dad). I loved him; I looked up to him; he was the best influence on my life as I was growing up.

After he passed away, it took me a very long time to come to terms with it; I reckon I did not fully move on until I was 15. As I was growing up, I have always been interested in drugs, they intrigued me and were everywhere around me, in school, in the media, in the music I listened to… everywhere.

Growing up, all my friends smoked cigarettes, and I stayed away from smoking until I was 16. Cannabis has played a big role in my life, and was the first thing I inhaled. Still scared of tobacco, I would smoke joints, with the absolute minimal amount of tobacco in them, preferably none; I did not smoke very often at this age however. I could probably count the amount of times I did so on one hand… maybe two hands.

When I turned 17, I went to a 6th form that I hated more than anything else. All my former friends either went to college or went straight into work. The place literally made me sick. The school was amazing in relation to teaching, but the people that went there were absolute arse*****.

I would buy a ten deck of b&h silvers from a corner shop that I knew did not ask for I.D, and would use them to mix with my weed. I did this because firstly I was skint; I wanted that 20 bag to last just that spliff or two longer, and because I was always told that you did not waste so much weed if you mixed the two together.

A level exam period. first year. I was under a great amount of stress, and did not want to smoke cannabis because I felt that it was exam period; I can’t smoke weed, I won’t be able to function to the top of my capabilities. I had made a number of friends at my local library who smoked cigarettes and I ended up smoking with them. It was a way to get away from my work for 10 minutes at a time. This was where I had my full real cigarette. I was already sub-consciously addicted to tobacco through mixing it with my cannabis, but this is the first full cigarette (as far as I can remember) that I had.